The Right Decision.

I am drinking alone at work on an empty hungover stomach. What does this say about me? Perseverance? Strength of character? High-functioning alcoholic? Who cares, the cocktails here are top fuckin notch, and don't you forget it.

Return Of The Mac

I feel obligated to blog, as I am fairly inebriated. But I have nothing to say to you assholes. That's right, I said what everyone is thinking. What are you gonna do about it? That's right, you got nothin'. You're boring. I'm out.

Waiting for Pizza.

I feel like I'm cheating

but I am not as drunk

as I should be.

Waiting for pizza

is the worst.

I can almost taste you,

chicken

mushrooms

gouda

mozzarella.

Thin crust.

I refresh your online ordering

and watch the bar change

across my screen

watching

waiting

salivating.

Any minute now

it will say

you are being delivered

to me.

But my stomach loudly

reminds me

that I am still hungry

and still waiting.

fashion

drunk haiku

i googled haiku
just to make sure i'm doing
it right and i am

drunk haiku

samuel adams beer
doesn't count as real beer but
i am desperate

drunk haiku

'twas cliffbar's b-day
when i got home from the bar
i ate cottage cheese

happy bday, you stupid bitch.